Season 3, Episode 2: Why Are We Here?

SPEAKER_01 0:04

Welcome to As the Dinoson's Turn, where we chronicle the adventures of the Dinoson family, a seemingly ordinary family from Iowa who decided, hey, you only live once. So let's move to Portugal. And now your hosts, Jason and Tracy Dinison.

SPEAKER_02 0:19

All right, welcome to another episode of As the Dinoson's Turn. We should have, we do have some outtakes that we could put out sometime, like us getting our room here set up.

SPEAKER_00 0:32

You would just be laughing at us because we're like, nope. Well, yeah, particularly when it comes to this setup, we've had to rearrange the office, right? I mean, things have changed a lot in this room in particular. This was the first room we set up in this apartment. So things have changed a lot in this room.

SPEAKER_02 0:50

Well, and you have to deal with the weird hybrid on me of being a combination of like an audio snob while also still having that uh small town radio side of me and the this you know the small entrepreneur side of let's cobble it together and uh make it through today.

SPEAKER_00 1:11

Definitely.

SPEAKER_02 1:12

And so then it's like, well, we're trying to set it up right, but then there's also my cobbled together systems.

SPEAKER_00 1:18

And well, speaking of cobbling together, I am more in this shot than you are, so you need to okay. There you go.

SPEAKER_02 1:28

Well, we've had one episode since our nine-month hiatus, but we wanted to come back and I guess talk about why we're here because it's been almost two years now, and I think sometimes it gets lost in the shuffle of why we came here to begin with.

SPEAKER_00 1:44

Well, and also, you know, talking about how long it's taken to even process some of the things that we were going through at that time. So, since, you know, quite frankly, I figured we would move eventually, but we were in the United States until our kids were done with high school and maybe even college. That's what I figured. But, you know, Jason had other ideas, and now I am ever so grateful for them. And during the time I was just trying to put out whatever fire was in front of us. So, um, but I think that this has been a great experience so far. So why don't you talk about what led you to no, we're doing this now, we're not waiting. There were a couple of good things there.

SPEAKER_02 2:26

Well, that we had always talked about moving to Spain.

SPEAKER_00 2:29

We had, and we tried to do that, and then COVID and Brexit and all kinds of things made that complicated.

SPEAKER_02 2:34

Yeah, so we started actually pursuing that, moving to Spain, and then yeah, then COVID hit at the same time, and right after that, changes with Brexit caused Spain to change their immigration laws. It was a whole thing, and so Spain just wasn't going to happen, and we decided that we would wait. We did the kids were out of school at least, because we felt then it would be more feasible, right?

SPEAKER_00 2:59

You didn't have to show as much money in order to have that in the bank and those things. But I think also the kids were nervous and and really I'd say scared of the fact. And you know, when you're raising children who are neurodivergent and you know have obsessive compulsive disorder and high anxiety, that's something that you really have to think about. Um that you do also the whole family has to be on board because otherwise this is never gonna work, right? And so I think that took a little bit too, but I don't know, like you decided that we were not going to wait.

SPEAKER_02 3:37

So well, I guess it's so we've touched on this kind of tangentially or whatever. Um, in March of 2019, some people listening know this. I brought it up to someone the other day. I said, Do you remember that? Oh, yeah, yeah, we were talking about that in the office just today, if it's someone else.

SPEAKER_00 3:57

So we live around the world and we never know.

SPEAKER_02 4:02

We do so. Um, I guess what I would say to be careful is that it involved a neck adjustment and a chiropractor, and I ended up in the intensive care unit for five days.

SPEAKER_00 4:16

Right. I mean, you had a stroke on spring break. Let's just say like there was a stroke, it was spring break, and it was also one of the hardest academic years um professionally of my life.

SPEAKER_02 4:30

That was the year your department got axed axed.

SPEAKER_00 4:36

Pretty much you didn't lose your your job, but some of your colleagues we were we were um downsized substantially, and so that all of that culminated into a very difficult year. And then the following year we had COVID. But we started talking about, you know, what does life need to look like? Because I literally am driving behind the ambulance thinking, okay, so what happens? I'm gonna have to go and live in Houston near my parents because I'm gonna need help supporting and raising these kids. Because if this is really happening, because he went from fine to really devastatingly not fine in a moment. Um, and nobody like it was one of those wait and see things. I was prepared um to have to uproot our family at the same time that everything at work was falling apart, and then we got that under control and then had one of the best midterm experience.

SPEAKER_02 5:32

So in uh May, about two months later, we were in Spain walking the Camino de Santiago the last 10 days of it.

SPEAKER_00 5:40

Right. And let's be honest, like Jason walked parts of it, but then took, you know, got injured.

SPEAKER_02 5:44

Um I actually, yeah, I suffered an injury, actually. I don't know that it was so much. Well, it was probably aided or whatever by my little health problem a couple months before, but I had an Achilles Achilles tendon problem and had to ride the bus.

SPEAKER_00 6:01

Yeah, so he rode the bus, which actually turned out well because we had several students have injuries during that time or that we had pushed too far, they were didn't want to push too far and took the bus as well. Um, but you know, it's not like we know I don't want to make it sound like you almost died in March and by May you were fine, because that was not the case. Um, it was definitely one of those things that, you know, we logistically try to work it through and never would have happened without our dear friend um going with us and becoming like just one of the best people that you could ever go to abroad with when you're dealing with all types of crises, or you need somebody to be able to do all the physical kinds of things, somebody um who can be there and be with the people who are like, let's take this out-of-the-way route and go up this insane hill. I mean, Taylor would, she was all about it and fantastic, and thank God for her on that trip too. Um, and being able to help make sure everybody, we made sure everybody was taken care of. But it was it was a lot. And that also, though, if you're walking and you have nothing else to do, um, you talk to each other a lot, right? And so we, I mean, we talk to each other all the time anyway, but then you start philosophizing.

SPEAKER_02 7:19

That was the trip where I saw the man with the cow in some rural village. This guy, he wasn't old. Well, I don't know how old he was. He had a mustache. He looked kind of like what was the way back when the guy with the coffee? Oh, what was his name? The coffee and the he was it was a coffee ad. Oh, what was that guy's name? It was like a Central American guy with a mustache and a sombrero and a dog. That guy. He looked kind of like that guy.

unknown 7:55

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 7:56

Only I think he was wearing like a farmer's hat.

SPEAKER_00 7:59

Which farmer's hats here are not seed corn hats, they are fedoras, or sometimes the old European, like you would, like a you would a kind of heart hat you would wear when you're driving your car in the US in the 1920s, you know, kind of flat top. And yeah. Anyway.

SPEAKER_02 8:14

Anyway, this that's kind of what this guy looked like was the Colombian coffee actor from back in the 80s.

SPEAKER_00 8:21

Okay, I I'm whoever that was, we'll have to it's fine.

SPEAKER_02 8:24

Well, the next time you're talking, I'll look on my phone here and see if I can find his name. Anyway, that he was like herding this one cow down the cobblestone path, presumably taking the cow to the pasture, and then sometime later he would herd the cow back up to the barn. And I thought, wow, what a that would be a fine life.

unknown 8:51

I do.

SPEAKER_02 8:52

I want to be the guy with the cow. I've always said that since then, ever since then. I've said, I want to be the guy with the cow.

SPEAKER_00 8:58

Well, and what I also love during this trip, the students would hear us talking and giving each other, you know, a hard time, um, and having these conversations. They're like, you guys need a television show. Like, I would just like listening to you all day long is just entertaining. And I'm like, well, that might be your lack of sleep and lack of entertainment right now in general, but you know, the students, yeah, the students said we should be filming every moment of our life. That's a little much, but we actually, you know, came up and had a couple of good things, but you had this idea, Carlos Sanchez. He played Juan Valdez.

SPEAKER_02 9:39

Yes, Juan Valdez. That's the name I was trying to think of. Juan Valdez, the Colombian coffee guy.

SPEAKER_00 9:47

I do not, for the life of me, remember seeing somebody who looked like that. You'll have to put a shot of it on the screen at some point, but I love that. I love that.

SPEAKER_02 9:54

I mean, I guess maybe.

SPEAKER_00 9:56

I mean, but at the same time.

SPEAKER_02 9:58

Um anyway, maybe the similarity is not that much.

SPEAKER_00 10:03

But anywho, but you did. You wanted to have your one cow, right? And and really, I think that was a metaphor for something else. Like, we wanted something a little simpler.

SPEAKER_02 10:14

I always say it's not literal necessarily that I literally want to just have one cow or whatever.

SPEAKER_00 10:20

It really does, let's be honest, but go ahead.

SPEAKER_02 10:23

But it's more simplicity. Like, like I'd be quite happy living somewhere where it's like I don't know. You wouldn't be happy living someplace with no electricity or anything.

SPEAKER_00 10:38

No, I draw the line there. I mean, I guess electricity and plumbing.

SPEAKER_02 10:42

Electricity and indoor plumbing and like being able to take a shower and stuff is that's nice.

SPEAKER_00 10:47

Okay. But like essential nice. Well, welcome to what I'm married to. Okay, go ahead.

SPEAKER_02 10:57

But it's like, what's your current address? I don't know. What's your phone number? I don't have one. Don't reach out to me. Goodbye. Like, I think that that yeah, but see, a lot of things all culminated at the same time. If we get back to why we wanted to move, refocus. Well, uh, everything that we've just talked about is actually well, maybe the Juan Valdez sidetrack was me going off on a tangent. But I was trying to paint a picture for people. Think of Juan Valdez with a stick in his hand, kind of hurting this cow.

SPEAKER_00 11:35

I appreciate the visual.

SPEAKER_02 11:37

But then when I see a picture of Juan Valdez, I said, well, maybe that's not the best any comparison, anyway.

SPEAKER_00 11:45

It's fine. So we have my medical incident followed by walking the Camino de Santiago at the same time as my entire department and life at the college is falling apart, and then transitioning to something else, not knowing what that would be.

SPEAKER_02 12:02

And then and then COVID, and kind of along all of that, I had growing burnout also from what I was doing.

SPEAKER_00 12:13

Well, I mean, running your own business and doing we have an animal in here. How did you get in here?

SPEAKER_01 12:19

You pushed the door, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:21

You're gonna have to put him away. Um, you know, running your own business, as a lot of you know, is a lot of work. And when you're doing taxes, all those things, it's all about being perfect. It's all about making sure that everyone is taken care of and that everything is done almost immediately, even though you're waiting on everything from people. And so I would say, yes, there was a lot of burnout there, but he wasn't the only one.

SPEAKER_02 12:44

Well, we both were burned out and burned out and disillusioned and disenchanted with what we were doing and with our fields that we were in for sometimes similar reasons and sometimes you know unique, different reasons, but we were both fed up, I guess. So in in 2020, during COVID, I started looking at moving to Spain because that's I mean, with your PhD and you had lived in Spain before, and we'd always love Spain, so and we'd always talked about it, and it's like, well, life is short, yeah, and I can do what I do from wherever in the world, so let's do it. And then if you f so okay, then it fell apart. As the dinosaurs turn, we had before we got the idea to move to Spain, we I we sold the house that we were living in and bought new construction. And then after, like, I don't know, two months in the new construction, I Jason's like, we're out. I was like, let's let's move to Spain.

SPEAKER_00 13:56

And I was like, Well, why the hell not? I mean, Spain to me, as you all know, is always a good idea. But we then got to that point, we sold the house, we were moving, we had everything ready to go, and the day we s were to submit with our lawyer all of our stuff, everything changed immediately. Uh, because Spain changed all of their laws, everything was then done, and we not only um were burnt out and kind of dissolutions, but I then had no job. Um, we had no house, and we didn't know what was going to happen. So we scrambled and it worked out. I mean, it worked out.

SPEAKER_02 14:34

We had to scramble, so we we then bought another house in Indianola, lived with my mother for a few weeks in the interim because we had we had closed, we saw our this was when the market was really hot. So when we listed our new construction house, it sold in less than 24 hours. It was like we signed the paperwork in the evening, and by like nine o'clock the next morning, it was so and then we were like, Well, what do we do?

SPEAKER_00 15:02

We thought about buying another new construction house, and then we found the house, you know, and we love I love this house, it was gonna be our forever home. Yeah, so I miss my kitchen.

SPEAKER_02 15:13

So, where are we at here? 2021.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

We're in 2021.

SPEAKER_02 15:15

First part of 2021, we'd live with my mom in the spring for a while, and then we're able to close on this new, not new hat, not new construction, but the Brady Bunch house. Yeah, it was literally called the Brady Bunch House.

SPEAKER_00 15:28

And I love the house and it's fantastic. But I have to say, we've then scrambled and it's like, okay, that dream is done. Like, this is the universe assigned, this is it. And you know, honestly, even with being disillusioned and everything at work falling apart, for those of you who know me, my mantra is like, it's okay, no big deal. It's okay, it's okay, it will be okay. Um, because I'm trying to tell myself that while I'm telling everybody else, like, we're gonna figure this out. So it worked. I mean, we figured it out. We got jobs, I had a wonderful classroom. Um, but teaching secondary school was really dangerous. Um, teaching in the United States is dangerous, but then teaching in a district where there are shootings and people are dying is definitely not the best, you know, thing to have happen. Um, so then taking pay cut and going back to an institution, thinking, okay, everything is fine. I've got this job, it'll be good, I can help grow this program. And then he comes to me and says, Guess what? I think we should move to Portugal, and here we've got everything we need. And so it all kind of comes together.

SPEAKER_02 16:38

Yeah, so then you have to move forward to nothing had happened with moving the rest of 2021 after we got we got in the Brady Bunch home. Tracy got a job teaching high school, I was muddling along with accounting, and then 22.

SPEAKER_00 16:59

We also we need to preface that when we talk about years, um, because I'm an academic, we think in school years, so think about it that way. So 21, 22, then we go to 22, 23. I'm in a new position, things are working, things are going on, but then we get to October, November, and it's like, no, guess what we're doing? And you have had some great opportunities come from this, but you also had the idea that you were going to do, like, you had this idea, like, let's do this whiskey bar. Like, you've got these whiskey casts. Like, for those of you who don't know, whiskey is a huge passion for Jason. But we are unfortunately in a country that doesn't have a lot of whiskey. So he probably could do fairly well there if he ever decided to do that. We'll see what happens there. Um, and so it's like, okay, well, you have these opportunities. This seems like a great thing, then let's go ahead and do it. We were vacationing in Portugal in November to check it out, rightfully so before you 22. Before you submit any paperwork, but our paperwork was submitted um not too long after that. So it was Thanksgiving of Thanksgiving of 22 during the world.

SPEAKER_02 18:08

Okay, so you taught high school for a full fall of 2021 through spring of 2022, and then in the summer and we had no real plans of moving.

SPEAKER_00 18:18

Summer of 22, I got a job and I was like, this is where I'm at.

SPEAKER_02 18:22

We were living in the Brady Bunch house, and it was going to be our forever home. It was. And then in the spring of 2022, we took a spring break trip to Mexico. And was it on that trip or what I don't really remember the certain? I mean, I know it was on that trip when I arranged a Zoom meeting with a lawyer in Portugal, but I can't remember if I had had that seed of an idea in my head before that and was talking about it, or if it was just like, hey, let's do this.

SPEAKER_00 18:57

No, it was a hey, let's do this. There was no seed. And then all of a sudden, I'm like, well, you know, we should probably go there. I mean, you've never been to Portugal. I had been to Lisbon and and the Algarve like once when I was living in Spain before, and it was like, okay, well, you know, let's go. Let's go to Portugal, we'll go on vacation, we'll see how that goes.

SPEAKER_02 19:16

So March of 2022, we had a virtual meeting with a Portugal attorney. And from Mexico, we met with an attorney in Portugal, and then nothing happened for a few months until July. I guess we decided to start moving forward with it.

SPEAKER_00 19:38

No, that's not what happened. Um, we met, and then I was like, nope, it's not the right time. July, you're like, no, we need to really keep doing this. You made all of this happen. And I was like, no, it's not going to happen because we already decided that the kids were staying where the kids are. It's fine, it's one of those things, and you know, no big deal. Well, you know, I don't know if you know this about Jason, but you give him an idea and he is determined to make it happen, come to fruition. So we got this in his head, and we go in November. And by that time, I was just like, let's see what you think. The only thing that helped us with the kids, or the only thing that helped the kids decide Portugal could be great, is watching a World Cup game, the first World Cup game between Portugal and Ghana in a bar with a whole bunch of people from around the world and a lot of Portuguese. And so they thought that was fantastic. This is the place to be. And the paperwork was submitted around that time because there were several possible business opportunities and other things that could be happening here. And it was like, okay, well, we'll see what happens. Because as we learned with Spain, the moment you submit something, it doesn't matter. They can change the laws and be like, no, we're closing the country down. It's fine, we're done. So we just waited to see. And then things came together and we were improved in January. And then we had to be here. And we had to be in country well before we thought we would ever have to. We thought we would be able to, this kids would be able to finish the school year. It would be fine. We would have the summer. I mean, we hadn't even put the house on the market yet. And then all of a sudden, we're approved. We got to get the heck out of the US and get to Portugal, otherwise, you lose your window.

SPEAKER_02 21:24

We so we moved with the house on the market, but not sold yet. We did. It's sold while we were in living in Portugal on like May 1st of 2015.

SPEAKER_00 21:34

For friends to help make that happen and to deal with all of the things that we also had to leave behind. Um, we did not leave the animals behind, which is why you can't see it, but Jason has a dog in his lap. So good old Stanley. Um but I think that there are a lot of moving parts, and as you're going through it, and the even after you get here, you think there's just absolutely no way this is real or it's actually going to be okay. Because once you get here, there are still Additional steps of the process you have to go through. So we went through those additional steps, and then you know, just the logistics of things like it's say for the first four to six months, you literally are putting out fire after fire and running around and running around. So the idea of disillusionment and burnout, being able to cope with it at any time. I it's too much. You're in the honeymoon period. So everything's like, oh God, it's so beautiful, it's so perfect, it's so beautiful, it's so perfect. And then you have to deal with real life after that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:34

I think our burnout journey is probably another episode. This was kind of a setup to that for how we got here and why. But I do think we need to have another episode where we talk about burnout. And we've had this discussion in previous podcasts, but I think we're in a very different position, both of us, yeah, mental headspace-wise on our burnout journeys.

SPEAKER_00 22:58

So we decided to go ahead and basically take the plunge, and he dragged me through the process, and I was not convinced it was actually going to happen. And I was like, Yeah, good luck. Because the Spain thing, I was set, I was done. I let, I mean, not even talking about it. It was going to happen. And then my heart was broken. So I was like, I'm not even going to engage in this. So you were on your own. Um, I like, I will help you with whatever copies you need, or like help you ensure that you understand that. But you, this is you. So this is definitely a Jason thing. Um, but I have to say, it was also under the guise of we're not living our lives the way we want to be living the life, as you are talking about with Juan Valdez and his cow. Um, but the kids weren't living their lives either. And we were not taking advantage of where we were and we weren't enjoying every day. And I think for us, well, we probably could have found another way to go ahead and just make it work for a while. Um, if this hadn't always been in the back of our heads, I don't think we would have just immediately just done it.

SPEAKER_02 24:09

And you had you have a pastry degree also. I do that you got kind of during COVID, I guess. Um and I had looked at the same time we were starting the ball rolling on moving to Portugal. Actually, I started looking at one of the local coffee shops that was for sale.

SPEAKER_00 24:30

Right.

SPEAKER_02 24:31

And actually, that was serious enough where I requested financials and even talked to one of my banker friends about getting a loan to purchase this coffee shop. And uh, that was what I was gonna do. And that was a point in my career where it was like I was gonna like pour the gasoline. That uh meme you of someone pouring the gasoline and they walk away and they flip the cigarette over their shoulder or whatever, and it's like that's kind of where I was like, I was like fantasizing till April, I shouldn't say this, this is horrible, but like waiting till April 15th and saying to people, here's your stuff back, I put you on extension and your tax return isn't done.

SPEAKER_00 25:19

Ah which is hysterical because like you were the most responsible person I know, and you know you would never be.

SPEAKER_02 25:26

But that's like the you know, the inner fantasies of a tax accountant.

SPEAKER_00 25:35

Okay, well, I think every tax accountant feels that way at the middle of the season, but I'd say at the same time, this was much more serious than I knew of how deep your burnout was. You you did not share that with me. I might have been like, I think we need to get a little bit of help here. Um, I did not know that. So welcome to a new revelation. I had no idea that was going on. But I'd have to say that, yeah, I mean, I knew you were looking for something to satisfy you and an entrepreneurship, and you had always supported me in what I was doing and all of my hare brain schemes. I was not gonna not support you. And I figured what worst case scenario, we've got a two-year or a year visa. Let's see what happens. And I think that the COVID changes for Portugal, visa length worked in our in our favor. Because if it had just been a one year and then you had to renew, I don't know if we would have renewed um because it's a lot of work and it's hard, but I don't know what we would have done. Um, but it it is a lot. But since it's a two-year, I think that's worked really in our favor. So um side note, if anyone decides they really want to do this, know that the first year, just like you know, any other time that you move, is really, really hard. Um, and I'd say it's even harder when you're in a place where you don't speak the language. And hello, Watson. Our other dog is here. Um I would say, oh, hello, Stanley. Um, I would say that it's really hard. And we almost wouldn't, I don't think we would have made it um ourselves. And we knew what we were getting into having me having lived abroad and all of those things before. But this is a two to give yourself two years before you decide what you want to do. Um, based on our experience, I'd say coming up on two years is a completely different spot than where we were coming up on one. Um, and I think that that is a big piece of what we're trying to kind of convey that as you know, his burnout was much more than my burnout was and the my knowledge of it was. Mine was I'm just gonna power through. And if I'm sick through all of this, whatever, um, I'll just kind of make do. You know, that's also our my my perfectionist thing. I'm not gonna tell people, it's just gonna be great, it'll be wonderful. And then now we are almost coming up on two years, and I think we have a very definite, different idea and a much more realistic picture of what we were getting into. But I think that we're in a place where we're like, yeah, this is becoming home and this is a good place to be. Yeah. Whereas last year, I don't think we were there yet. Probably not. Yeah, we were working. Probably not. Yeah. So with that, yeah, call it good.

SPEAKER_02 28:44

I think we'll wrap this one up, but we'll talk about more about burnout on our next episode. Catch us again next time.

SPEAKER_01 28:51

You've been listening to As the Dinosons Turn, a podcast presented by Dinoson Media Ventures. Don't forget to like and subscribe, and catch us again next time for another episode.